It’s one thing to expose the lies we’ve been believing about ourselves throughout our lives; it’s another thing altogether to do something about them. The really life-changing work happens through replacing those lies with truth.
At the end of the kayak adventure with my friend Ryan, I decided to be honest with myself about the messages that were running in my conscious and subconscious mind throughout most days. I took some time and wrote down the words and phrases that described my internal dialogue. The first words that came to mind were scared and afraid. Then, worried. Then a realization that I would, at times, bend the truth in hopes that others would approve of me.
Next, I admitted to myself that I performed for others and cared a lot about what others thought of me. After that, the painful descriptive word weak. Through this process, it also came to light that I would often hang back and not take initiative. Then the kicker, just one word: fearful.
Once I got these specific words out on paper in my journal, I laid them in front of me and had a very practical conversation with God. Although I had been following Jesus for a while, this type of frank conversation with the Father was somewhat new to me. It went something like this: “God, thank you for revealing these deep lies I’ve believed about myself for many years. Only You fully know when each of these lies set in. I don’t want to live like this anymore. I know these lies are not from You, God. Show me a way out of this pain.”
After I sat in silence for a few moments, staring at this page in my journal with so many painful lies scribbled out, an idea came to me that I believe was from God. What if I wrote down the opposite of each lie? To take it a step further, I wondered what would happen if I awoke each morning and read aloud these descriptive words—words that were the opposite of what I currently believed about myself. It could be powerful! (Chapter 4 Am I Loved?)
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